Somewhere I Belong
by JasHale
Summary: There are always two sides to every story, this is just mine. One slip in a string of many, the tale of what awaits me when I return from the fall. Jasper. M for 'Lemons'.


_It is not often I can contain myself, and many times I have slipped, this is but one moment in time in which my slip has affected others._

_Jasper_

**Somewhere I Belong.**

I watched as she moved gracefully through the room, her step expressive and light as one would expect a ballerina's footfalls to be, her small yet curvaceous body called out to me as it always did, her skin milky white against the darkness of her choppy hair, the smile on her face meant only for me as she rushed once more into my waiting arms, this was what destiny was meant for us as on second nature my arms closed around her and lifted her into my embrace. Her legs wrapped around me on instinct, her squeals of joy making me smile widely. Alice… Her name rang in my mind over and over as her tiny hands tugged against my blond curls making me grown as she leaned in to kiss my lips tenderly.

This was not our usual greeting by far; on contraire it would be rare that we would show such affection in an open view of our family and yet this was no normal day. I could feel her excitement bubbling up within her as she drank in each part of me she could, I felt myself do the same for her. I had missed her so.

I felt her nuzzle close to me, a sigh of content leaving her lips, my own erratic emotional climate going out to her the moment she nuzzled into my neck. Too long I had waited to feel her within my arms once more; too long I had imagined her smiling face as she cuddled into me, pleased to see me once more after what seemed like years apart.

In reality it were a mere two weeks of pure torture without the other, two weeks without touching her, holding her and just seeing her, two whole weeks of not knowing how she would take my return….

I felt the burn within my throat before the girl even rounded the corner; I knew I was in trouble as her scent drifted towards me, mouth-watering and so much better than any animal. It had been so long since I had tasted the soothing gulps of human blood to satisfy my parched throat, so long since I had felt what it was like to have the flesh of a fresh bite and the glorious taste of human blood on my lips.

Each second she drew closer, all I could think or feel was how much I needed her blood. Almost four years since my last slip, four years in the confines of the small town just off the edge of Seattle, the place where Alice and I had settled, along with our adoptive family, my brothers and sister where none too thrilled to have moved here, while my father and mother were practical in their workings and reasoning's of why we where here.

To ignore the scent of human blood was increasingly hard for me; I had spent so long receiving it each time I wished that my levels of self-control lacked greatly for our lifestyle. My family were "vegetarian", only ever feasting off of the blood of animals, an alternative to taking human life, and while this was by no means the life I had imagined, I could see the benefits of it each day as I watched my Alice walk happily amongst the human innocents who would once have been our food supply.

Animal blood was by no means satisfying to me, the rich taste of human, far too hard for me to ignore against the bitter and often stale taste of animal, there were times when I would fall completely off the wagon, destroying many lives in the process just to get one drop of that sweet nectar the humans produced. And yet I never relished the idea of murder. My gift would prevent me from a glorious kill, as it so often prevented me from leading a perfect and nearly uneventful life, or as much of one as I could muster, each painful memory within the human mind before death had plagued me for each person who had died at my lips.

My gift, perhaps you wonder, is by no means unique, and yet in the vampire eye it is far from common, the gift of empathy, to feel what others emotions are and to manipulate those emotions to my will. Meant that I would always feel the deaths of my victims, not something one would wish to feel from their food.

While I never relished the idea of a kill, however, there was only one reason for why I did not hunt the Animals meant to feed us, and that reason had come to me in the strangest and most unexpected of forms, her tiny hands taking my own large ones close and leading me from my darkness and into God's light. My angel held a name, Alice, a dainty little thing, almost a foot and a half shorter than I and completely beautiful in every way. Dark hair, pale skin and the smile that would melt any man's heart in an instant, and she was all mine.

Only Alice could hold the power to make or break me on my thirst for blood, and only Alice could ever hold the patience to guide me in my quest to deny it. We had found the Cullens over two decades before and we had moved with them many times, all because of my lack of self-discipline and control. The Cullens were a fairly large coven of vampires and with Alice and I to their number, there was no way for them not to be noticed. We moved many times.

I could smell her, her scent wafting towards me, simply mouth-watering as my mind lost track and my eyes began to darken, the girl would feel little pain, yet the terror would be immense, the way she moved, the way she walked and each second she touched at her neck, I knew that I wanted her. Not for her looks or lust, no, I had Alice for that and I would never stray, but for the one thing Alice could not offer me. The blood.

My mouth pooled with venom as I attacked, the girl, barely nineteen had no time to scream as I latched to her neck, drinking deeply of her life's blood, my record once more broken as I took the life of yet another innocent while still under the care of our father, Carlisle Cullen. Emmett had found me, his voice betraying his panic to those less fortunate in gifts than I as he pushed to make sure I would release her.

Another Slip. Another move.

My punishment had been two weeks. Two weeks away from the world, where only I could find company in myself, surrounded by thicket and deer to help curb my thirst while the family packed up and began to move into our newest lodgings to be. Carlisle had made it quite clear I was not to step foot near their newest house until I was certain that the blinding rage that often followed the kill of a human had subsided so that I might not harm any in my family…

Two weeks and it felt like a lifetime.

The way it felt to hold Alice in my arms once more would never be described enough to do it justice upon a page, her arms circled my neck and shoulders, pulling herself closer as her little legs wrapped around my waist, her eyes gazed only for me and her lips pressed only to mine as silently we conveyed all the pain of separation we had shared, each time I would need to stay away would be like a dagger in our side, Alice would miss me just as much as I her, she would hurt just as much as I did, so to hold her once more in my arms was a moment of more than great pleasure as her sensual body pressed closely to my overly awakened, and very much underused in the last fortnight, cock.

Just knowing how close I was to the Promised Land now was enough to make any man weep. I knew she felt the same as her scent thickened each second she was within my arms once more, her eyes glazed over some as she gazed to me, her kisses both soft and demanding proving a sweet prelude to what was, I hoped, to come.

To say I was addicted to her would be an understatement, the amounts of times I had had this woman in the last decade would have astounded even the most pronounced of sexual addicts, I might have been the only vampire addicted to making love to my wife more than the addiction to human blood, which in itself for me was always stronger than other vampires of our kind.

Alice's lips pressed firmly to mine as her tongue darted out to run over my bottom lip, begging for entrance to my mouth, without thought I allowed her to deepen the kiss, taking in her sweet taste as her tongue began its dance with my own, this was what I had missed, what I had needed. Too long I had wallowed in sorrow when here stood the key to my salvation and happiness. I felt my jeans tighten substantially as my body became overly aware of hers.

The sound of a throat clearing cut through our moment then, I almost growled in frustration as I realized Edward and the others were still in the room. My brother Edward was by far the most annoying thing about this life, it was not that I did not love him, or even like him as a person, it was that each private thought was always left wide open to his prying mind. Edward the mind reader, telepath extraordinaire.

I pulled back from Alice and set her once more upon her feet, turning to face my family for the first time since they had discovered yet one more body to my ever-growing list. My mother, Esme, looked saddened and yet I knew better than to think that her emotion was anything but being happy to see me, while the others looked mildly uncomfortable, only Rosalie stood out with any significance.

My sister who looked so much as my own flesh and blood looked upon me with contempt. Possibly the closest one to me besides my wife and father, Rosalie never neglected to broadcast her emotion to all. She hated me. In that moment she hated me so thoroughly for my inability to control myself it was staggering how I still managed to keep myself from crumbling under her cold gaze. She hated change, the constant moving meant change to her and the constant moving was only brought on, in her eyes, by myself. I had no doubt in my mind that she would not talk to me for a few months.

I looked down awkwardly as my family stared at me under cool eyes, waiting for them to make the next move as I still felt Alice beside me, her hand lacing with my own wordlessly. In the end it was Esme who spoke first. "It is good to have you home Jasper." She smiled kindly to me as the others, bar Rosalie, nodded in pure agreement.

"Thank you, Esme." I paused to bite the bullet as I spoke. "And once again I would like to apologize for the trouble I have once more caused." I looked down then to the tiny hand in my own, squeezing it lightly in reassurance as she began to worry for me. I heard Rosalie scoff loudly and mutter something that sounded a lot like 'sorry isn't good enough' before the sounds of her footsteps followed by the door, rang out within the silence. Emmett cussed and followed her obediently with barely a look cast my way.

Carlisle sighed deeply, looking to Alice and I with apparent understanding. "We understand Jasper, welcome home." His gaze did not meet mine as he wandered from the room, apparently unable to deal with me, just like the others as Esme smiled apologetically to me before taking her leave, Edward soon after. I was the outsider once again and the family held no knowledge on how to bring me back within the circle.

I felt Alice slowly bring my hand to her lips, turning to her now as she looked to me sadly, her eyes filled with so much more than love in that moment as she spoke barely above a whisper. "I'm glad you're back… I missed you." I frowned for a moment at her acceptance of who I was, unable to understand how she could stand to be near me while the others chose to run away like cowards and not face the fact they had a killer in their midst.

"I missed you too." I whispered softly before she began to lead me upstairs, following her scent in the unfamiliar house, we reached a door that was only half ajar; the familiar scent intensified enough to confirm this was Alice and my room. She lead me into the room silently, moving to close the door once we were inside and I was able to take a look around at our new home, the familiar furniture mixed with the unfamiliar walls confirming this would be our new home for hopefully a while.

I watched with a sigh as Alice moved to perch on the bed, patting a space beside herself for me to join her there, her eyes never once leaving my face as she did. Moving to where she was, I joined her on the bed and gazed down into my hands, unable to face her for now as the silence spoke volumes to both.

'_Where have you been?'_

'_Nowhere'_

'_Why'd you do it Jazz?'_

'_I was weak…'_

Weak that was what I was, undeniably weak against my inner demons, and here my angel sat before me, recognizing my faults as they were. I waited patiently for her to make the next move, knowing that she could choose to stand up and leave me at any moment, or she could stay there and offer me silent support.

As I waited, I began to doubt she would do anything at all when I felt a small hand upon my cheek, her thumb caressing my cheek and causing a spark of fire over my skin, hot and welcomed, sending familiar jolts to my cold heart and to my very aware groin. She coxed me to meet her eyes slowly, a small smile on her face as her golden eyes smoldered my way.

In an instant I knew all was right, my own hands moving to find purchase on her small frame as she closed the distance between us to kiss me passionately once more, her lips parting this time, inviting me into her mouth as my own tongue snaked between her lips to tangle against hers, massaging each other in the sweetest and yet deeply smoldering of kisses. I felt her hands find purchase in my locks once more, tangling there as she moved slowly and surely to straddle my legs, my own arms snaking around her and settling my big hands firmly against her perfectly shapely ass.

This kiss was like no other, this kiss was the kiss of passion, the prelude to the sweetest and yet the sexiest of times we would spend with one another. Growing heated fast I felt my already throbbing cock press hard against my jeans, aching to reach her heat which rested only above through the flimsy fabric of our human clothing.

I wanted her like I wanted no other, over two weeks without the comfort of being inside of her was enough to drive any man mad from sexual frustration. I had seen heaven in between her thighs before and now I would not stop until I could see it once more each time she came for me.

Trailing my lips from her perfect mouth, I traveled them down her luscious neck, nipping and sucking where I could over her throat and to the place where her neck and shoulders met. My hands worked fast against the buttons of her shirt, exposing more and more flesh as I moved, my hands pulling the shirt from her body and moving instantly to caress her breasts, moaning into her mouth at the mere thought of the privilege only I would ever share from her. Squeezing lightly as my mouth trailed to suck at her collarbone once more, I was near astounded, as always to hear her moan.

The guttural sounds coming from within her throat and chest always proving to make me want her more, knowing that only I would ever hear that sound from her made me even more determined to make her moan and writhe.

Pushing me back a moment she placed one of her small hands over mine as they squeezed and played with her hard nipples, pushing down to show me that she wanted me to be rougher, while the other hand of hers worked to get the shirt from my back. I could feel her arching above me and each movement of her sent a jolt of friction into me as she rubbed against my tight jeans, the sensation going straight to my dick.

I needed them off now. I spun us round then, laying her down on the bed, my hands leaving her breasts for a moment as my mouth latched firmly to one of her nipples, causing yet another moan to escape her. My hands moved to make quick work of her jeans, pulling them off from her body in one swift movement with her panties, the scent of her instantly grew stronger, her arousal prominent.

Quickly I worked my own jeans from my hips and worked to free myself from the confines of the restricting fabric, already short of the underwear I saw no point in wearing, I found myself bare below, matching her own nakedness, bar the shirt which still rested upon my chest.

I lapped at her breast then, while my right hand drifted to kneed her other breast between my fingers, causing her to arch her back to me, her legs rubbing against each other furiously to get any form of friction she could find, while her hands gripped my half unbuttoned shirt, which in a moment when I bit down lightly on her breast, she growled almost ferally and tore from my back.

I chuckled then and pulled away, smirking cockily at her. "Anxious are we?" she growled at me and moved to pull my head towards the other breast where her pert nipple called for my attention. She moaned as my tongue darted out over her sensitive nub, the pleasure running through her making my own lust levels rise and my cock beg for attention and yet I would have my time, this was about her. I trailed my lips down her chest to her stomach and lower, my hands moving to push her legs apart, the aroma of her arousal so strong here I could practically taste it, and I would.

I looked to her for a moment to see Alice gazing glazed eyed at me, the lust within her prominent even without the ability to feel her emotional climate. She licked her lips as my eyes found hers, encouraging me on silently. I smirked at her again before dipping my head between her thighs, kissing her lower-lids once before commanding at her "Open your legs wider Sugar." Hearing her practically purr as she did as I asked, exposing herself better to me as I moved once again to taste her, my tongue darting out to trail roughly along her slit, causing her to mew in pleasure, my hand moving to find her clit as again I dragged my tongue along her before plunging it between her folds causing her to arch her back slightly as my fingers worked at her from where my tongue could not.

Her hands gripped my shoulders fiercely, her hips bucking slightly into my face in an attempt to make my tongue go deeper within her sweet core. Lapping at her sweet juices, I slowly began to raise her already fever pitch emotions and push them higher towards the ending, knowing that the bliss will hit her ten times harder than the bliss of a normal man, her steady mewing became more and more labored as my tongue, hand and gift worked together to pleasure her, my other hand lifting her leg over my shoulder to allow better access still causing her to come hard for me, my name rolling off her tongue as though I were a god.

_You ain't seen nothin' yet Princess._I thought with a smirk as I lapped up eagerly her juices, making sure to take in every last drop from her I could before pulling up from her crotch, smirking at her dazed expression, my tongue darting out over my lips to get the last of her taste to savor as she recovered some from her release.

"You taste so fuckin' amazin' darlin'…" I drawled out at her, my accent thick from my own arousal, still prominent to the point of painful. I felt her moan more than heard her as she sat up lazily on her forearms. Her eyes still lust clouded and her hair ruffled from her own hands tugging at it as I worked. "Are you going to move back up from there?" She asked shakily, as I smirked and rested my chin to her thigh, enjoying the view.

"Depends…" I licked my lips once more as she watched me. "On what you want me to do… Since you've had your moment…" She narrowed her eyes at me then, probably seeing my plans, also knowing that I was in desperate need for my own release, my erection harder than ever and all for her.

She smiled sweetly at me then, taking her sweet time to talk. "What I would like, Jasper; is for you to come back up here and fuck my brains out." She smiled the sweetest of smiles to me as I felt my dick tighten once more as it strained to full potential, her words unexpected and yet so welcomed as I moved up and began to kiss her deeply again, muttering to her. "You are a very, naughty girl Alice." My hands moved to her hips to squeeze gently against the flesh of them, causing her to moan out softly.

I felt her hands slip once more into my hair as she tugged lightly, growling out at me. "I think I need punishment… Hard punishment… No mercy." One of her hands trailed then to my ass, causing the fire and spark of my skin to travel straight to my groin. My girl was asking me the most wonderful of things, and who was I to complain?

I trailed my lips to her neck and nipped lightly before entering her swiftly, causing her to moan loudly as I felt once more, how ready she was for me, my cock seemingly made to fit her body as so much of me already was. I felt my own moan escape me as slowly and surely I began to move in and out of her, the friction causing both of us a wave of pleasure as finally after what seemed like an age, we are joined as one.

Running my hands down her body, I marveled at the feeling of perfection that came over me, the pleasure intense and completely addictive each time I slipped within her tight confines, moaning into her ear as I did. "Oh God you are so tight…"

She growled at me then, hissing out loudly. "Fuck me Jasper" Her hands moving to my ass again and pulling me into her as far as she could, her growl still apparent "Hard."

"Yes Ma'am." I growled to her as I began to pound harder into her tight pussy, the way she molded to my cock causing feral growls to take me as waves of pleasure filled the air not only from her but from myself, each movement causing more and more friction between us as the bed itself moved with us, banging against the wall and causing me to moan out as the sound mixed with her constant string of profanities and my name, and my own moans of pleasure. This was what I was made for. Pleasing her in all the ways she needed. I was made for her.

My thoughts began to grow hazy as I felt the distinct beginnings of bliss, my release so close, only spurred on to hold by her rapidly approaching climax which seemed to be at the seams of her mind, each movement causing the edge for her to come closer and closer before I felt her muscles begin to clench, moments later her climax hit her hard, my name screamed from her lips like an angel's breath as she came down from her high slowly, I gripped her hips harder and began to pound into her to bring my own release after a few moments, feeling my cock give a jolt as I felt myself fill her completely. Her name seeping from my lips as I felt myself collapse onto my arms, hovering above her, my bliss resounding through my body long enough to make me rest my head to her breasts, taking in deep breaths of our scents as they mix…

Her hands moved into my hair and began to stroke through my locks softly, lovingly as she placed a soft kiss to my forehead, I held fast so not to put all my weight on her, still buried within her for the moment as we both calmed together, the love I felt for her growing with each second as we lay together like this.

Each thought of my mistakes pushed aside for only thoughts of one another as I placed a gentle kiss to her chest before pulling out from her and rolling to lay on my back, dragging her along with me to rest limply on my chest, completely satisfied for the time being as we snuggled close, only choosing to speak after a long moment of silence between us.

"You are… amazin'…" I muttered as I felt her smile widely against my chest.

"Could say that about yourself, cowboy." Alice giggled and placed five quick kisses to my chest, making me smile at the sweet gesture.

I sighed then, the moment I knew for sure once more that she loved me, this moment had been coming for a long time this week as I fiddled idly with my wedding ring, the part of her I always carried with me, even in the darkest of times she was there… I wondered for how long until something burst my bubble of happiness, for this had to be too good to be true, especially for someone like me.

"I love you Alice, I'm sorry about… everythin'."

She moved to sit up slightly, leaning in to brush her lips with mine, not bothering to cover her breasts with the sheet as she did, completely comfortable with me in every way as I was with her, she nuzzled close to my neck and placed a soft kiss to my throat.

"I love you Jazzy, I always have, I always will."

I smirked then; "How do you know you always will?"

She giggled softly and kissed my nose. "Because I'm psychic silly!"


End file.
